Only resourceful and innovative beggars can make a living in Nairobi

There is a hill on James Gichuru Road in Nairobi city that I really detest. Mostly because the vehicle I drive is a stick shift that needs momentum to tackle a steep incline. I dread getting stuck behind a smoking tipper truck that makes such a racket, anyone within a 200m radius can hear the gears change. However, it cannot be avoided.

The narrow potholed road is the shortest connection from Westlands to Ngong Road, traffic notwithstanding. Often, while idling in traffic envious of boda boda riders whizzing past, I have been accosted by a young man with a frown on his face and a form in hands.

No eye contact

We have met more than thrice now. He hardly makes eye contact and all I ever hear is ‘sponsor’. Sponsor is the code word for soliciting cash for some urgent needs with legal mandate from the Chief’s office.

The long face is supposed to get your heart bleeding and this particular kid can really screw his face but he hardly spends any time making his pitch. Before you can react, he is gone. I have been tempted to shout back, “Hey, Kid! Haven’t you heard of the elevator pitch?”

In traffic, all you got is a 30-second window to summarise who you are, what you want and why I should be bothered. Have a resigned demeanour but for impact, show the cause of distress.

If you do not have a visible injury or physical deformities consider a placard around your neck with a clearly written message, “I am an orphan. My hearing is impaired. I need money for school fees. Help a fellow Kenyan”.  Appeal to the humanity of strangers by lingering briefly to push guilt buttons but not long enough to get them worried of their phone.

Another pair I bump into frequently that could do with a change of tact includes a blind man led by a younger man, going from car to car at a frequently gridlocked junction in Westlands. Usually, they walk right past my car because my vehicle reads ‘struggling”.  They target dark coloured luxury vehicles with tinted windows. They have no pitch. Just a visual impaired individual led by a guy who looks bored out of his mind.

My point is, competition is stiff these days, even for street beggars. Only resourceful and innovative beggars can make a living in Nairobi. Demanding plain old charity simply because life is rough isn’t going to cut it anymore. Everyone needs a good pitch.

On the other hand, the average hawker in Nairobi traffic is very street smart. The recurring traffic bottlenecks in Nairobi means the average commuter spends at least 2 hours a day parked on a major highway.  Encounters with hawkers are inevitable.  Some of the best fruit I have bought was on Uhuru Highway.

The fruit sellers tend to lure me in easily and their product is good. I have bought fruit at a petrol station mostly because the sellers positioning was perfect.

Close the sale

A man is more open to spontaneous shopping when his car is fueled. Hawkers are experts in closing a sale. A little hesitation, some eye contact and they swarm in. It is a five seconds sales pitch. Mostly they rely on the visual. They display the product in clear wrapping because consumers buy with their eyes first.

Brand Nairobi should consider sponsoring the hawkers to work along Mombasa Road. There are the first smiles the foreign visitor encounters upon arrival in this hectic city and perhaps the only people who greet strangers in traffic. Besides hawkers are the few people in this city who clearly understand that selling is not the same as talking.