I hope you are well wherever you are. I thank God for this opportunity to write to you and I sincerely hope you get to read this letter.
Mum rarely talked about you. She gave us very scanty information about you. In those early years and with mum around, I never thought much about you either, but when she passed on in 1996, and many issues came up, I started asking around about you.
I have been told many different things by different people that I approached. I was even told that I have aunties in Kitale who claimed that their brother died without a family and they didn’t mind meeting me. However, I refused to go because they did not fit the description I had of you and where you came from.
I have also been told that you came from the Coast region though not Swahili or Mijikenda. You know what? My mum made sure I studied Kiswahili up to university, sometimes I think I reminded her of you!
My grandmother told me that you worked in the media and you met my mum when you were on attachment in Kitale in the early 70s. She said you left with the full knowledge that mum was expecting your baby and you gave me the name Hellen after your mother. The story goes that you told my mother that if the baby was a boy, then I should be named John or James after your father. I don’t know if you still remember because I came out as a girl! You know I cannot prove this but somehow it satisfies my curiosity.
Anyway, I want you to know that I am now a full grown woman. Not bitter but better. I would like to meet you and tell you that no matter what, I am thankful for bringing me into this world and I love you very much.
People tell me that I look like you. I would also like to meet my grandmother and the rest of the family if any. I want to believe that you did not just abandon my mother but even if you did, dad I FORGIVE you.
I have sent you countless messages on the many Father’s days in the past but this one here is the best ever.
Your daughter, Hellen