Even after losing nine family members in a car crash, veteran politician George Nthenge says despite his tragic loss, life accorded him another chance to start anew. He spoke to JOE OMBUOR on how he picked up the pieces.
"Within seconds, my world changed from warm to cold and my life’s race went back to the starting blocks," George Nthenge, a veteran politician and businessman said of an accident that occurred 30 years ago, robbing him of nine family members.
Nthenge at his curio shop during the interview. His son, Anthony, who survived the accident works with him. [PHOTOS: Evans Habil/Standard] |
He adds: "In a split second, we went bang into the dark, ugly nose of the hulky trailer and our world imploded on that early morning of September 11, 1978. America’s 9/11 was still 23 years away and the world had never heard of Osama bin Laden."
But Nthenge feels on that day both Osama and 9/11 had descended on him simultaneously.
Nthenge, who drives to this day, was driving the family’s Peugeot 504 station wagon. His wife of 25 years, Imelda Damaris Mukui, was on the passenger seat.
No word came out
Nine of their 11 children and a niece were also in the car as they headed to Nairobi from their Mumbuni home in Machakos town. The Nthenges usually commuted for various activities in the city where he ran a curio business and the children attended school.
"I lost consciousness on impact and when I came to minutes later, I was being driven to hospital accompanied only by my 21-year-old son, Antony Mathembe, daughter, Victoria Ndila, 15, and niece, Wavinya Jonah. I was disoriented. I tried to shout demanding to be told what had become of the rest of my family, but no word came out. I just stared blankly as my son, Antony said softly: ‘Everybody is dead, including mummy’."
Ndila died two days later. The nine were buried the same day at Nthenge’s Mumbuni home while he underwent treatment at the Kenyatta National Hospital. Antony survived the accident with a broken arm while Wavinya succumbed to her injuries two months later.
Apart from his wife, others who died on the spot were Teresa Keke, 24, Peter Musyoki, 21, John Mutonya, 13, Agnes Ndindi, 11, Walentile Mutile, nine, James Munyao, seven, and Valeria Mbuvi, six.
Start life afresh
Nthenge returned home after two months at the hospital, ready to pick the pieces and start life afresh. "I organised a thanks giving party for those who helped bury my people and immediately embarked on looking for a wife who would take care of my remaining three children and myself," he says.
Nthenge and his late wife Damari (back row, left) with their children. Those who survived the accident include Anthony (immediately in front of Damaris), first born (standing, third left) who was abroad and daughter (front, right) who was in school at the time of the accident. [PHOTO: Courtesy] |
Part of the qualities he was looking for in his new wife included age (someone above 25 years), good education and a record not tainted by prostitution, birth to a child or previous marriage.
It took him an entire year to find the right candidate with the assistance of many friends.
The pick was a former nun who was at the time studying to be a teacher at Kenyatta College (now Kenyatta University).
On December 12, 1979, about 14 months after the accident, Nthenge walked Scholastic Kavata down the aisle at the Machakos Catholic Cathedral where Archbishop Ndingi Mwana A’Nzeki declared them husband and wife.
Nthenge’s second marriage has yielded four sons, all of whom have gone through university. One, a lawyer, holds a PhD.
"I have no regrets whatsoever about the tragedy that befell me because I believe that everything in this life happens out of God’s will," he says.
"God opened opportunities for me to serve people as a leader by attending many funerals where I console the bereaved. That helped me see death as something inevitable and helped me accept God’s will," he recounts.
Nthenge who still shuttles between Machakos and Nairobi, advises other drivers against cramming all their families into one vehicle as he did.
"I learnt a painful lesson. I would not like others to go through what I went through," he says.
As a staunch Christian, he does not prescribe to the popular belief that witchcraft could have played a part in the tragedy. "Rumour has it that my step brother and other relatives had a secret hand in it, hence their decision to stay away from the funeral, one of the biggest ever witnessed in Ukambani," he says.
Nthenge, who was absent during the burial says it was done on his instruction because he does not believe in keeping the dead.
"When I die, I should be buried the same day or at most, the following day. Keeping bodies only punishes living relatives," he says.
Tragic loss
He describes his loss as tragic but not devastating. "When it happened, I remembered an engineer school mate who had no children and thought that I was still better despite my loss. I also remembered my business partner, Krishen Maini who had three children like the ones I had remained with and took consolation that he beat me only with a wife. I knew I would marry and beget even more children.
His advise to men who lose their wives at a prime age, leaving them with children to bring up: "Do not rush into marriage but take your time to look for a woman with a big heart who can take care of another woman’s children. Look for a mature woman, preferably close in age to your departed wife who will not see you as an obstacle to her youthful indulgence."
Nthenge believes children are likely to respect a self-respecting stepmother. "It is not advisable to bring them someone they will be ashamed of."
"Above all, remain close to the children by spending enough time with them. Do not allow a situation where your children regret the absence of their biological mother."
