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Five reasons why you cannot reach orgasm
By Fay Ngina | Updated Mar 18, 2018 at 15:13 EAT
An intimate couple
  • According to the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, only 64 percent of women had an orgasm during their most recent sexual encounter
  • 10 to 15 percent of women who have anorgasmia, the inability to reach orgasm after adequate sexual stimulation


This mostly affects men. When a man becomes addicted to masturbation it is harder for him to reach orgasm because his body is used to one thing. “He becomes conditioned to a certain sort of manipulation that allows him to ejaculate and that sensation is lost when he’s with a partner,” says Dr Harry Fisch, a sex therapist. When man responds better to making himself ejaculate, making him orgasm while having sex can be really hard.

Bad sex

It can be difficult for you to orgasm when you partner is not giving it to you the right way. For you to orgasm, especially women, there must be clitoris stimulation and the G-spot. Most men have a hard time understating how the female G-spot works. If this happens, talk to your man and let him know what he has to do to make you orgasm, otherwise you will continue to ‘suffer’ on your own.

Sitting too much

While sitting at your desk may not seem as harmful, spending too much time sitting might actually be a reason why you cannot orgasm. Sitting at your desk for a long time may shorten your pelvic muscles leading to pelvic pain and finally making it hard for you to orgasm. According to Kat Van Kirk, a sex and marriage expert, “Some people may notice these tissues after a few months of sitting too long. To prevent this get up every half-hour during your work day.”

Taking too much alcohol and less water

Taking too much booze can make it very hard for you to orgasm. Your body needs water to orgasm according to Dr Eden Fromberg. “The arousal tissue that extends into the connective tissue system is comprised of collagen, elastin and relaxin. For the arousal tissues to work its magic, it needs to slide and glide and it can’t do so without fluid,” explains the doctor. The next time you have sex and you can’t orgasm, check on the amount of alcohol you take in a day.

Not peeing before sex

Think of this scenario, you are having sex with your partner and you bladder is full, how possibly can you orgasm? It’s incredibly hard if not impossible. The stimulation of the clitoris and the urge to pee is not a good combination. “It can be incredibly hard to reach orgasm when your bladder is full because it’s hard not to be thinking,” says a sex therapist. When you lose concentration when having sex, trying to orgasm will be a waste of time. So ladies, remember to empty your bladder before you have sex.

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