Unmasking men hidden emotions
By Brian Tonny Ogolla | June 4th 2020
This exclusive article seeks to adequately discuss some social myths and prevalent misconceptions about men's emotions by both men and women. One of the cultural myths in the community is that men's emotions are taboo subjects to discuss, and this cuts across cultures, backgrounds, color, and religion.
From time immemorial, men have been best described as emotionless creatures, and this is because of the environment that male adolescents are socialized, and therefore this affects their ability to deal with feelings which have been systematically suppressed over some period. This practice has "toughened up" young men from a tender age to mask any expression of pain or frustration, and hence after leads to them to suffer in silence.
Men have been socialized in an environment that portrays them as being self-sufficient, and thus they should handle adversities silently. This conduct has gone on unabated across cultures and backgrounds in the stereotype of a confident, resourceful, and stoic male. These systemic events and actions, in the end, lead to what is known as ideal male behavior within our societies.
Suppressed feelings can lead to toxic masculinity. This causes them to bottle up their emotions, and that is part of why men suffer steeper rates of suicide and engagement in risky actions. Some of the red alert signs include; withdrawing from family and friends, toiling extended hours at work, devoting more time away from home, excessive drinking of alcohol, and behaving recklessly and/or in a violent way.
Part of the problem is that some men have masked their feelings for a long time, that they have depleted instruments required for handling negative emotions when such do arise. Such emotional roller-costar can seem overwhelming at times for them. They intentionally have tried deviating from the traditional masculine norm by being emotionally expressive, but this has not worked effectively since most are often judged as being weak. For example, if a guy and a woman exhibit the equivalent amount of emotion over something (for the specific instances, crying because their dear dog died), a man will likely be singled out for it. His counterparts will then advise him to stop complaining and find means and ways to cope.
Gentlemen must intentionally choose to reach out to close loyal friends and family and talk to them openly without shame on their real emotional experiences. Additionally, men should promptly get specialist counseling from leading experts to powerfully aid them properly adjust and cope adequately with societal pressures.
Men are encouraged to borrow a leaf from women, who unlike men, they frequently talk about how they feel without fear of stereotype from society. It is time to change the status quo and women are also encouraged to pay attention to men's feelings and supporting them in this aspect. This should be the primary campaign for getting rid of toxic masculinity and nurturing healthy and productive males in society.
In conclusion, it is critical to reinforce that men in similar fashion, experience genuine emotions and that the story that men are not emotionally expressive is inaccurate, and that indeed many are still in the process of socialization.
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