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Lifestyle
Why men should embrace relationship and marriage counselling
By Dayan Masinde | Updated Jul 10, 2019 at 12:36 EAT
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Couple in counselling (Photo/Monkey Business Image
SUMMARY

There are a lot of forums equipping women to be better wives and mothers but few for men, leading to a disjointed union

A lot of men want to be great husbands and fathers but their pride keeps them from seeking wisdom

1. A lot of men are going through issues and negatively affecting their relationships/marriages. Counselling unpacks these issues and addresses them in depth.

2. Counselling brings about self-awareness and self-awareness brings about healing and purpose.

3. Husbands are the head and when the head is whole, the family is whole.

4. A lot of men want to love but don't know how to love because society has largely not allowed men to love. Counselling teaches men to talk and open up.

5. A lot of men don't understand women and a lot of women don't understand men leading to conflict and meaningless arguments. Counselling allows the two to understand each other.

6. Even though most men don't show it, they hurt when the relationship/marriage is not going well. Counselling equips men to be proactive in providing leadership.

7. Due to ego, a lot of men are self-destructing as they pretend to be know it all. Counselling teaches men that love is about learning and growing together. No one knows everything.

8. A lot of women would love to seek guidance through counselling when their relationship/marriage is stuck but their men become the stumbling block rejecting guidance. When men become a part of the process, growth happens.

9. There are a lot of forums equipping women to be better wives and mothers but few for men, leading to a disjointed union. Counselling equips both.

10. Counselling provides a safe and private place for men to vent, open up, and communicate to the woman effectively about what he feels she does wrong away from the public, sheltered from family and friends.

11. A number of men turn to counselling when the damage is already done and the woman is walking away heart broken and the children damaged, instead of turning to counselling when the issues are manageable. Don't wait until it's too late to seek help.

12. A lot of men want to be great husbands and fathers but their pride keeps them from seeking wisdom. Wisdom resists the proud, counselling allows the man to listen to his wife, to himself, to his past, to his future and to his actions.

13. A lot of men are not addressing their personal issues. So they are exporting into marriage their hurt, addictions, bad habits, stereotypes, sexism, excuses, fears and red flags thus hurting their wives, children and themselves. Counselling addresses the root cause of issues.

14. A lot of men would love to tell their wives how they truly feel about her words, behavior, attitude and what she does that breaks him. Counselling allows men to speak out in a place where emotions are calm and measured, managed by a neutral party. This brings about healing.

15. Drinking, smoking, pornography, violence, escapism are ways that some men are dealing with their issues but don't solve anything. Counselling provides solutions.

16. Counselling allows the man and his woman to take stock of their journey and what is really important. This perspective helps couples to refocus, rekindle their love and not blow issues out of proportion. The woman cannot fight for the relationship/marriage alone, she needs her King.

© Dayan Masinde

I invite you to attend the MOTO MOTO COUPLE SEMINAR organized by MARRIED & SAVED on Sunday July 14th 2019 at the August 7th Memorial Park Conference Hall in Nairobi CBD (Next to Co-operative Bank, opposite Railways bus station) from 2:30pm to 6pm. Charge is Ksh. 500 per person. The topic is A HEALTHY MARRIAGE: looking at the sexual, emotional, spiritual, financial and social health of your marriage. To book your slot, text or call 0721590954.

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To purchase the MANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word MAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.

To purchase the WOMANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word WOMAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.

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