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Are sex symbols realistic?
By John Kalya | Updated Jun 27, 2016 at 01:20 EAT

When considering romantic interests we instantly conjure up an idealistic image of our dream guy/girl. For guys we consider a light flawless skin, slim, comparatively shorter, elegant eyes and meticulously accentuated curves. We tend to be attracted to girls that have these characteristics, before we get to know their personality and character. Ladies may be more character-oriented (I heard), but I also hear, tall, dark and handsome. By handsome there is that broad shoulder you can lean on, there are those sexy side-burns and, of course, at least a six pack but preferably an eight-pack.

So, with the ground standards established we dive into the real world to look for these symbols. We have read about them in books, we have seen the in the TV serials and soap operas. We have seen them on big billboards and on commercials passing everything they sale as a means of enjoying the company and/or the attention that comes the sex symbols. We want to compete with symbols. We hit the gym and cut on diet. We even get some pills downtown or online that promise instantaneous results that may or may not be used complementarily with the other methods.

After a few heart breaks here and there, our eyes are opened. Tom was tall, had a six-pack and was handsome. After a few dates, you were the envy of all your girlfriends. There were some things you did not like about Tom, maybe he was a control freak; but you neglected it. You would rather stick to him than see him walk away with one of your girlfriends, so you hook you wrist on the cradle of his elbow and smile. Recently you just found out the strength in his biceps when you confronted him over some compromising chats on his phone. He almost broke your hand with a hard pressing. You tried to walk away you see the full wrath of his hitherto sexy six-pack.

When Michelle said “yes” you couldn’t believe it. She was just so out of your league. She was a fantasy come true. You cannot stop thinking about her; her smile, laugh, oh her eyes. You feel like a king when introducing her to your friends. Her beauty, to your eyes, has no match. But Michelle is too “free-spirited”; she likes going out and having fun. You would rather have her all to yourself. She also has more needs than you can handle. Sometimes Michelle is dropped late at night by a big car she says belong to one of her girlfriends. Sometimes she does not want to talk; other times she says words which are true, too true that you cannot take it. She says you cannot handle her.

In moments like those, the façade fades and you see the reality. Behind the perfect shapes and choreographed expressions, are people with weaknesses as common as anyone. Behind the brawny man are insecurities, ego and insatiable anger. Behind the curves and pretty face is a broken lady who seeks to be accepted and understood; fighting the demons of her past the best ways she can. This type of introspection also enables us to consider judging a book more by its content that simply lifting it off the shelf because of the glossy cover. We see ourselves for what we are and in the process meet other people, pretty or plain, and seek to know them first before making conclusion based on sex symbols.

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