The issue of birth control between men and woman

By SHARON FLORENCE AGWALA | Tuesday, May 5th 2020 at 12:46
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My social circle comprises of men than women, so a lot of topical agendas are mostly men oriented.

There are things that come up that upset me in conversations. I do not let it sit with me; I actively attack, and the more I attack, the more transparent their brains get to me. It is quite evident that there are quite a number of men out there who are still scared and agitated by the fact that women make a lot of decisions concerning their very own lives in various matters, especially those that are meant to empower them.

To my surprise, in this era, women should not feel obliged to follow malicious orders from men even with no commitment at all in terms of passionate relationships or any other relationships.

I am not starting a revolution, but I am still upset with the fact that there are still young, naïve women out there of all ages who are still victims of circumstances.

In most cases, young girls in both primary and high school who have boyfriends play emotional and psychological games, which lure them into giving up their very own voices and personal will.

To the extreme, there are young women who call their husbands “Mzee wangu,” yet there are age mates. How absurd is that?

One of my “friends” was talking about how unfair it is that women have a say on when they should get pregnant and how bad it was that birth control pills are easily accessible to women.

To my surprise, he was backed up by his fellows, saying that men are the ones who should be allowed a say on when to get babies. Women should just wait to carry the baby to term, and that is all a woman is good for. That is when it got me wondering.

Who is to be responsible for birth control? Is it the man or the woman?

This debate goes on and on, but at the end of it, women end up taking birth control seriously since they are on a catastrophic end. What bothers me is not who takes birth control but who has more control over the birth control.

Most men barely care for what women want but what they get, Like who gets to call the shots in the relationship.

Let’s say if a tender aged woman gets pregnant, unexpectedly, the young man will literally claim his noninvolvement in the matter, yet the damage has already been done. Why? Mostly because they lack control in that situation. So women end up being the unfortunate ones.

There are cases where married men flee the home after women give birth to an additional number of children than expected, for example, triplets or children with special needs, this is a topic for another day. You can still see the control aspect of the situation.

Women are still being controlled, yet they can decide their future and how society treats them.

Ladies, this is the voice of a man who keeps telling you, “I love you, and I miss you.” On a daily basis and you are fooled by the fact that being loved and missed is all that matters in the world.

I feel like once we are taught how to wear a sanitary towel, we are women enough. Trust me, no woman has adequate knowledge to walk a life of freedom by themselves. We still need our sisters, friends, mothers, aunties, grandmothers, men who support women empowerment, and activists. We need each other. That voice that speaks with clarity, even in condemnation. That voice of a true woman. Who is a woman? A generation of possibilities that alone is powerful among many.

We have to know what we are, embrace these values, and teach the generation to come. Pick up your sister, tell her about her worthiness, and see the world change. Let us change the narrative. Especially when the world is staying safe, keep a sister safe.

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