1. You rejoice when bad things happen to your spouse to teach him/her a lesson, you find satisfaction in saying the words "I told you so". Failing to realize that you two are a team.
2. When you succeed, you want to gloat and brag to your spouse to make a statement. This is called spouse rivalry and it is unhealthy.
3. You feel bitter when your spouse is right and you lose an argument. You seek revenge to come out on top.
4. You try and remind your spouse that he/she is not as educated as you. You may be more formally educated but you are very insecure.
5. You call your spouse names such as "spoilt brat" just because he/she comes from a more privileged family and upbringing than you or has a better relationship with the parents.
6. You fail to show up for your spouse's achievement events such as graduation or birthday, and even when you do attend, you want to blow your own trumpet to steal the show.
7. When people say something good about your spouse, you highlight what is negative about him/her.
8. You feel unhappy when your spouse succeeds, earns more than you or chooses to advance in life. You try to clip the wings of your spouse.
9. You have to ruin your spouse's day when you see him/her happy because your spouse cannot be shining without you or more than you.
10. When you see your spouse getting along with people, you make statements such as "You are such a people pleaser", "Look at you pretending to be good"; because you want your spouse to have a miserable social life like you.
11. You ignore posts that your spouse makes online of success and feel uncomfortable when you see him/her getting compliments and likes. You forget you are blessed to have him/her.
12. You keep looking for fights and arguments because you don't want your spouse to be at peace. It bothers you that your spouse is happy.
Learn to be happy for your spouse. Your jealousy will keep you from appreciating your spouse, your insecurities are holding back joint progress in your marriage.
© Dayan Masinde
In my new book, MANHOOD SERIES, I walk with men through the journey of understanding themselves and their woman.
In my other new book, WOMANHOOD SERIES, I walk with women through the journey of self-discovery and how to relate with the man.
To purchase the MANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word MAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.
To purchase the WOMANHOOD SERIES written by Dayan Masinde, MPESA Ksh. 200 to 0721590954, then text the word WOMAN and your email address to the same number and the book will be sent to your email address for you to download and read on your phone or computer.