They have never seen adults outside the house walking without masks....
Most people don’t know the difference between real friends and social media followers
As usual, I am here again blaming technology for the number of rising depression cases. The hardest hit are the youth of the mahewa generation. Blame it on how most were brought up. For us, the effect is mitigated (I have always wanted to use that word) for the fact that we were taught to keep on fighting and not to lose hope. A majority of us grew up with inspiring stories of how our parents started from single-room houses with a mattress and kerosene stove. That was drummed into our mango heads so many times to make us realise that our lives were easier, but that we had to keep making it better.
Today, when someone commits suicide due to depression, keyboard warriors are quick to give advice about the kind of friends one keeps. The problem here is the word ‘friend.’ According to my dictionary, a friend is a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations. The true definition of a true friend is someone who has your back, no matter what. A true friend will always have your best interest at heart. They will never deliberately lead you to choices or decisions that aren’t good for you.
I think the problem is that most people don’t know the difference between real friends, workmates, groupies, acquaintances, fans, followers on social media, people who like your posts and admirers. I have said before that if you’re popular, 90 per cent of the people are not your friends. Don’t confuse people who follow you on social media for your friends.
As soon as you figure out this, you will understand that it’s likely your friends are not more than the number of fingers on one hand. When you grow up, you will know friends are there for good and bad times; they will invite you when they have celebrations and tragedies too. They are not there for your money. During tragedies, it’s your support they need most. Support could mean just your presence.
Even during celebrations, it’s not about the money, but maybe being an usher. This means you don’t approach anyone when in problems, since not everyone is your friend. This confusion leads many to disappointment and more depression.
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One cannot blame them as they will also argue that ‘if you don’t call me to celebrate with you, why call me to mourn with you?’ Most of the celebrities go through these depressing moments because when they are on top, they assume the people they grew up with, and they don’t want to be told the truth. In my case, my friends are mostly the guys I grew up with in Buru, and guys I have known since then. When I am wrong they will talk to me directly about it. They know me from the time I was walking half-naked, barefoot and most will call me Bolingo.
So, the people you drink with or hang around you when you have made it in life are there because of what you have and what they can get from you. This is the reason one is advised to work hard and invest in themselves for the future. When you become old, your family members will likely be busy and the health insurance will only deal with you if you have a history with them. You will definitely need money to stay healthy. Usually, if one has a medical case without insurance, they call a harambee. That’s when you know you have few friends.
As my friend, Israel Burale once wrote, “Some of the people planning evil against you could be your so closest friends and acquaintances. Be watchful, be as wise as a serpent don’t show your joker card just yet. Let them not know what you are going through let the element of surprise be your golden key. The less you depend on them the more likely you are going to have less depression and disappointment.”