Skip to main content
× THE NAIROBIAN POLITICS TEN THINGS ASIAN ARENA TRAVEL FEATURES NAIROBIAN SHOP MONEY FASHION FLASH BACK HEALTH UNCLE TED BETTING Podcasts E-Paper Lifestyle & Entertainment Nairobian Entertainment Eve Woman Travelog TV Stations KTN Home KTN News BTV KTN Farmers TV Radio Stations Radio Maisha Spice FM Vybez Radio Enterprise VAS E-Learning Digger Classified Jobs Games Crosswords Sudoku The Standard Group Corporate Contact Us Rate Card Vacancies DCX O.M Portal Corporate Email RMS

Benjamin Zulu: Your partner shouldn’t stop you from going back to school

By Brian Guserwa | September 18th 2021

A partnership is about helping and supporting each other, says relationship coach and psychologist Benjamin Zulu. 
He says even in a relationship, it is still important to pursue one’s goals and ambitions.

“Your personal development is mandatory in your relationship. People cannot stay in the same space. Even when you get married, you are supposed to pursue the best version of yourself and help your partner grow into the best version of themselves,” he says.

The reason people, especially men, are afraid of their partners following their dreams is because they are scared of being outgrown.
“People get afraid of their partners pursuing academia because they fear that they will get something they themselves don’t have. Their partner will become bigger than them, and they will remain irrelevant.”
“You married a girl, and now she is becoming a woman. There is an element of control to it; when you married her she was immature, and you could exercise some control over her. 

“By becoming a woman, she removes herself from that control, which terrifies some men. If you were supporting her financially, then the idea of her getting her own money means she will be able to support herself,” he says.
Zulu adds that, “Love is meant to be based on emotional support, mutual friendship and companionship.” 


Share this story
‘I am doing my Master's’ no longer turns on millennials
For a long time, getting a Master's Degree was a dream come true. ‘Useless’ papers and a failing job market have turned the tides.
Nairobians are eating ‘air burgers’ for lunch
They flock parks, shopping malls and bunge la wananchi to soothe their hunger pangs.