Modern parenting exposes children to neglect, harm

Even as we celebrate strides made towards protection of children’s rights in the past three decades since the adoption of the Convention on the Rights of the Child, more challenges still face children today.

Technological advancements, for instance, have made the world a ‘global village’. Unfortunately, this presents nothing close to the ‘village’ we knew growing up. Back then, being a parent was considered a noble duty that entailed effectively journeying through life with children, being consistently present, never mind the number of children.

Sadly, these age-old standards for childcare are quickly eroding. In their place, we have adopted an off-hand, quick fix, remote parenting style which not only threatens to bring forth a generation devoid of values and sound culture but also one deprived of entitlement to proper parental care. The culture of banishing children as young as seven to boarding schools, enrolling them for ‘tuition’ as soon as schools close, buying them gadgets to keep them busy, is deeply disturbing. These and other emerging ‘avoidance’ practices by caregivers have significantly contributed to delinquent behaviours among children and youth.

Incidences of unrest in schools, outrageous teen sex parties, cases of gang culture, drug and substance abuse, among other vices, are gradually becoming the norm. This certainly calls for careful reflection on our level of investment in sound parenting at family, community and state levels.

Child neglect broadly means any omission that deprives a child of basic age-appropriate needs, thereby resulting, or enabling the potential to result in physical or psychological harm. In addition to elaborately providing a comprehensive package of safeguards for the rights and welfare of children, Kenya’s Children’s Act underscores the role of the parent as, among other things, provision of guidance.

Even with such legislation in place, child neglect accounts for the largest number of child protection related cases reported at the Department of Children Services. An estimated 200,000 children in Kenya currently live in institutions because their parents are unable to provide them with adequate care and protection.

Children are increasingly becoming a burden than a blessing to their caregivers, suffering neglect in the hands of those expected to nurture and protect them. Child neglect not only inflicts physical wounds but leaves mental scars on children, compromising their ability to learn and socialise.

There is evidence that this form of child abuse impacts their transition to adulthood with adverse consequences later in life. These include emotional and interpersonal difficulties, high levels of negativity, poor impulse control, personality disorders, low levels of enthusiasm, lack of confidence and assertiveness.

Lack of commitment on the part of parents, communities and the state to due quality attention to raising children presents far reaching implications both on the child and the community. Interventions need to address the root causes of neglect. The tendency to view neglect as only deprivation of material needs is ill-informed.

Spending quality time with our children to understand and address their developmental needs goes a long way in ensuring stability in their emotional development. Children are learning all the time, regardless of whether anyone cares to guide them or not. This is the information age. To remain relevant in the lives of our children, we need to give them a reason to ask, as opposed to having them ‘google’ or consult their peers for answers to the many questions they have.

Conversations need to happen at all levels. Government needs to step up efforts to prioritise this issue in terms of policy and practice. Of essence is ensuring strengthened community-led interventions aimed at establishing contextually appropriate prevention and response interventions that take into account the challenges families grapple with.

Strengthening the family unit needs to take centre stage. Factors predisposing children to neglect should be identified and effectively addressed. There is no shortcut to sound parenting. The goal of parenting should be to grow children who will positively impact the world. We are sealing our future in the way we are raising our children today. A happy childhood is the greatest gift that parents have it in their power to bestow.

- The writer is the Child Protection and Advocacy Manager at ChildFund Kenya.