Disunited deal

By Tony Ngare

If the English Premier League were a classroom, Arsenal would be the boy who works hard throughout the year but fails to make the mark. Manchester City would be the spoilt kid who gets all the expensive and fancy books but is never interested in reading them. Liverpool would be that pupil that is very proud of his father’s academic achievements. As for Man United, it would be that kid who just rides out the term but still emerges top while Chelsea would be the pupil who fails and blames his teachers then his family hires a new teacher every year.

However, there was one exam that the Red Devils failed. Manchester United has conjured up some piece of history. United failed to advance past the Champions League group stage for only the third time in 17 years after a humiliating defeat at — hold your breathe — Basel.

When the Champions draw was announced, there was outrage among United rivals claiming that United seems to get easier draws. Now they don’t know what to make of this latest scenario.

United fans have to be reminded that they will now be playing on Thursdays with teams that have names that sound like the chemical formula for Ebola drugs. Their City neighbours, too, are in the same boat.

Almost a year on from a multitude of obituaries for his Chelsea career, Didier Drogba was the man to make a Bridge of sighs sing once more. Andre Villas-Boas could need to learn a few things from him about resurrection, and as the Ivorian departed the field to a standing ovation, the coach’s often-pained look was converted into a brief grin of calm.

That Chelsea are in need of rebuilding is without doubt, and of the Lampard-Terry-Drogba triumvirate said to have once been too powerful in Chelsea’s Roman era, the striker had been expected to be the first to lose his powerbase. However, he provided progress and perhaps time for his manager.

Frank Lampard’s disgust at being subbed on Saturday supplied an opportunity to express that Villas-Boas is eager to see off public shows of dissent. The only statement asked for here was one of qualification, and a 0-0 draw had been incorrectly presented as enough. Instead, Chelsea approached their task with power rather than flair at the heart of their tactics, and quick dividends arrived. The goals now see Chelsea sit at the dinner table of select few in the Champions League knock out stage.

With Arsenal already sure of emerging Group winners, Arsenal manager Arsene Wenger put out a weakened team that was the toasting of a determined Olympiacos. The Gunners were duly and deservedly thrashed. You could feel the joy inside the stadium in Greece. But as the Olympiacos F.C players were swapping jerseys with their Arsenal counterparts, the bitter news hit home.

Football can be quite ruthless at times. The victory was not enough for Olympiacos to progress to the knockout rounds, as Marseille came from two goals down to beat Borussia Dortmund 3-2 in dramatic fashion in Germany.

Goals from Jakub Blaszczykowski and Mats Hummels had put the hosts in control, but Loic Remy pulled a goal back just before the break and Andre Ayew levelled on 85 minutes. Two minutes later, Mathieu Valbuena produced a magical goal to send Marseille through into the knockout and condemn Olympiacos to the Europa League. Such is life.