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Five ways to step out from the shadow of shyness and build your confidence

 Building your self confidence will help you have a healthier social life (Image: Shutterstock)

When you have little self-esteem, you have very little to give in your relationship. And this is one the many relationship killers.

Think of it this way, you can’t give what you don’t have. It really is as simple as that.

Negative emotions, suppressing your emotions and being extremely shy take away from your day-to-day connections with the people around you especially if it has to do with a romantic partner.

This however is not uncommon and this is why. You don’t like how you look in the mirror, you could be earning more, you are not where you want to be in life especially financially or relationally, you hurt people around you and the list goes on.

It is a struggle many of us have learnt to overcome.

To ensure you have a healthy relationship you must build your confidence and stop being your own worst critic by doing this:

  • Get over it
  • This may sound harsh but it is the hard truth. You are no longer that awkward teenager back in high school who had very little control of their life.

    As an adult in a relationship, take charge and ignore that negative voice that tries to convince you are not worth of love.

    Acknowledging your doubts and fears will help you stop from sabotaging your own relationship with negative feelings and thoughts.

  • Seek help
  • The best person to talk to about your fears is your partner. Let them know what you are going through and the challenges you experience while being in a relationship.

    This way, they can help you make changes in the right direction by reassuring you of their love and commitment to you.

    It may also be a good idea to opt for professional help especially if your relationships always seem to end prematurely.

  • Fake it
  • This may not sound like good advice but it actually works. Hold your head high and carry yourself with confidence by doing the right things.

    Start by dressing well, put on some makeup, get a new hairdo, hit the gym, enroll for a new course or apply for a new more challenging job. Somehow, this will make you feel a certain way about yourself and it will be reflected on the outside.

  • Accept compliments
  • Compliments are like gifts and when a stranger or your partner tells you something nice, accept it and say thank you.

    You may not believe it but that does not mean it is a lie. People see you through their own lens and just because you may not feel attractive or intelligent does not mean others see you that way too.

  • Eat properly
  • Yes, I know this is not what you expect to hear but here is why your diet plays a huge role. Studies have shown that unhealthy food patterns can cause mood swings.

    For instance, foods high in refined sugars and carbs result in an increase in depressive symptoms due to a spike in the glycemic index. This will lead to low energy and irritability.

    When your body lacks fuel from what you are eating, your mind and body can’t function properly. It is therefore important to eat lots of fruits and vegetables and engage in exercise to keep your body in good working shape that will be reflected on how on you feel and treat yourself.

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