Tips on how to handle a green-eyed monster friend
By LOLITA BUNDE | 2 months ago
Do you sometimes feel like the closest person to you is also your worst enemy? It is very common to have a friend who is jealous of you. Nonetheless, jealousy can sometimes be good for others to improve themselves.
However, when you have a friend who is always criticizing your moves and predicting doom to your future, it could be time to take a step back and evaluate your friendship.
Here are some signs of a jealous friend:
- Envious of everything
If your friend is always wishing they had your life and everything you own, that is a red flag. We are all different, if you two were meant to be the same then you would have been born twins.
If she also owns exactly the same things you have, then she is totally jealous of you.
When they cannot acquire something you own, they will either manipulate you to give or sell it to them.
- You are competition
If you constantly feel like your friend is competing with you. Then she is not a true friend. Your relationship with her is all a big race.
The easiest way to know if you are in a competition is when they constantly ask for your opinion in their life and do the opposite every time.
In most cases, they don’t need your help, they just want to gauge if your opinion is better than theirs.
- They are negative energy
Are you scared of telling your friend about something new you are venturing into? Or are you scared of telling them of an achievement? If yes, that’s a serious killjoy to your life.
Your friend is the first person you should run to with your problems and achievements. When you hesitate to call your friend over things happening in your life, you are scared of their reaction. Red flag!
How to deal with this situation:
i. Evaluate your friendship: Jealousy is a feeling that can be brought about by many things. Your friend could be stressed by work, drowning into depression or she is simply a bad person.
Try to figure out exactly when you started feeling she was toxic. If she has been jealous from the beginning of your friendship. It is time to take charge.
ii. Talk to her: The easiest way to sort out your issue is by talking it out with your friend. If she is a true friend, she shouldn’t have a problem understanding where you come from with the issue.
However, if she accuses you of being the bad friend and throws a tantrum. I think you know your answer.
iii. Limit what you share: Ladies are wired to blab about their lives’ achievements and failures to friends. However sometimes it is good to keep some issues to yourself in case you feel your friend won’t understand the basis of your decisions.
Maybe it is your oversharing that is overwhelming your friend and she may not necessarily be a bad person.
iv. Widen your circle: Sometimes the easiest way to sort out an issue is by widening your circle. It doesn’t mean you befriend the whole office but maybe just one or two more people who can relate easily and faster to the things around you.
Sometimes sharing your work life with your longtime friend might not get the reception you expect.
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