Please help! My manhood is too small, What drugs should i take to make it bigger? : Evewoman - The Standard
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Between The Sheets

Is there a solution to my small manhood?

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Dear Eve,

Nataka kusaidiwa na dawa ya kunenepisha penis yangu. Inakuanga ndogo. (My penis is small. What drugs can I use to enhance it?)

Morris

Dear Morris,

There is no such medicine. The penis that you have is the penis that you have; there are no safe medicines intended to make it larger. In addition, it’s important for you to know that some products touted as penis enlargers actually end up harming it so please avoid gimmicks that could leave you bigger problems than a smaller penis than you would like.

I encourage you to lose weight if necessary because those who are overweight tend to feel like their penis is smaller. I also encourage you to learn to work with what you have because a woman’s body is pre-installed with so many easily-accessible nerve endings that make sex enjoyable for men and women of all sizes.

Finally, love your body as it is and not as you wish it was. Think about it; would you want to have sex with someone who didn’t like you? Probably not! Why not see you and your penis as a team whose abilities are unstoppable? Now that’s the kind of sex partner any one would love to have. Love the skin you’re in, Morris.

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Dear Eve,

Is it bad for my sexual partner to finger me and lick me using his tongue?

Sue

Dear Sue,

In a nutshell, no it is not “bad” for your partner to finger you or lick you. All of that is part of a very wide variety on the menu of sexual activity. That said, I would be very curious to know why you think that licking and fingering would be bad.

Everything sexual that you do is ‘allowed’ but the one to allow or disallow it is you, not me and not your partner so if you’re engaging in sexual behavior that is uncomfortable or troubling to you, my advice would be stop until you understand your motivations better. The last thing you need is to develop sexual problems or other problems in your relationship because you chose to override your body’s natural protective instincts and do something that you felt was “wrong” for you.

Remember Sue that in sex, as in life, the ultimate responsibility lies with you so don’t be afraid to say no, even when that no is to yourself or your partner. In a nutshell, you have the right to be fingered and licked to your heart’s content; you also have the right to say no to that or any other things that doesn’t sit well with you. Whatever you decide, I wish you a happier and more enjoyable sex life.

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Dear Eve,

I am scared of having sex since I feel embarrassed. Please help.

Dear Reader,

Embarrassment is actually quite normal especially if it is your first time to have sex. I would be curious to know what your embarrassment is about; are you worried that something will go wrong? Are you wondering how you will know what to do? Are you shy for someone else to see you naked? I don’t know. What I do know is that sex is a very natural, biological function and our bodies are made for it. In other words, you would not be doing anything that your heart, mind, body and soul cannot handle, unless of course you choose to do so. Here are some things I want you to consider:

How old are you? In other words, are you old enough to consent? Remember, for sex to take place, consent is key. If you are over 18 then you have the right and responsibility to consent to having sex.

Do you feel safe with your partner? In other words, would you be having sex of your own accord or would you be doing it because you are feeling pressured or coerced into sexual activity that you may not feel ready for? 

Remember: Abstinence is a very valid sexual decision. You don’t have to have sex if you’re not ready, and if you are, then you have the right to do so. Whatever you decide, I hope you find it to be an experience devoid of embarrassment or shame.


Maggie Gitu holds an MA in Marriage & Family Therapy. She practices as a Marriage, Family & Sex Therapist. Reach her at [email protected] or via her Facebook page: Maggie Gitu. 

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