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5 worst mistakes you can make when texting someone you fancy - without even realising

Lady Speak
 Do not be a “hey”person

Have you ever received a text from someone you fancy which was so ambiguous, so annoyingly unclear you yearned for the days when love letters and serenading were the done thing?

For something that's meant to make our lives easier, the murky world of texting actually makes things quite confusing .

Are you getting enough sleep?

There's so much push-and-pull. You like them, you want to see them, but you don't want to sound overly keen, but you also don't want to play games etc.

So it's perhaps no wonder we make mistakes and trip up.

And there are five mistakes in particular which get people riled - or make them lose interest .

Take note

Speaking to Business Insider , sociologist Eric Klinenberg (listed the five big no-nos based on their extensive research.

And their findings were very interesting indeed.


Klinenberg kicks off with a message we've all received.

"Please, please, please do not send the generic 'hey' text that has nothing else accompanying it.

"It's a very confusing and strange message and tells people nothing."

2. Playing secretary

No, not like that you filthy lot. What Klinenberg and Ansari mean is the "endless loop of schedule attempts with a person you've never met or hardly know.

"When you get into conversations like:

"'Oh can we meet at Starbucks on 4pm on Tuesday?'

"'Oh no 4pm on Tuesday doesn't work for me, how about 6pm on Monday for a drink?'

"'Oh Monday I've got spinning class, I can't make that.'

"Three or four of those exchanges and all the energy is sapped out and people just forget it and 'swipe left' and move on to the next person."

People are making these 5 mistakes when texting someone they fancy

This can get tiring

3. Overly long texts

There's a fine line between the ambiguity of just 'Hey', and an essay about, well, everything according to these two.

"Really, just a couple of sentences are ideal.


"One thing we learned is a very strong opening text is something that recognises both the name of the person and says something which makes it clear you know who he or she is.


"If you can do all that in a witty way, it's a bonus."

Be succinct

4. Poor grammar and spelling

A bugbear shared by many, in the fledging stages of a relationship, Klinenberg urges us to get this right with this brutal piece of advice.

"Maybe you should study a little bit more before you ask someone out via text."

5. Don't ask to "hang out"

"Finally, don't ask someone if they want to 'hang out.'

"No one has any idea what that means. Do you want to watch a game? Do you want a beer? Are you trying to hook up? Are you taking them to meet your friends or parents? It's totally ambiguous.

"And no one wants ambiguity when they're trying to text and make plans."

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