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Gentlemen, style up! Your bedroom skills are really wanting

Lady Speak

We women are very simple creatures; we are not complicated like most men assume.

Our needs can be summarised into three or so points.

Pay our bills, listen to us when we talk or at least pretend to; compliment us once in a while — it does not matter whether you mean it or not, the thought is what counts; shower us with gifts and set aside time to take us out on a romantic date. And, listen up gentlemen, for this is very important - for heaven sake, remember that we women too have needs in the bedroom!

I know this may seem strange for some men, but play time in the bedroom was not only created for men’s pleasure, women too have conjugal rights. Oh yes, rights to the big ‘O’ once in a while, you know.

Some romance

And in order to attain this, we need some romance, foreplay here and there, and a partner who has thorough bedroom skills. I can bet my last petticoat that if you sat down with most Kenyan women, not many know what an orgasm is, because they have never experienced it.

About a week ago I was at a bridal party for a friend, and apart from the usual unhelpful advice about cleanliness, neatness and being soft-spoken, there was a sex guru at hand who laid it down for us women on all the tricks and treats of how to please our men.

Relationships magazines

And as we sat listening, it hit me like a thunderbolt that on the other side of town my friend’s fiancé and his friends were not somewhere being taught how to keep their wives happy. They were probably somewhere hanging out and having some good old fun with ‘the boyz’.

Of course, in our culture or society men cannot possibly have a problem when it comes to bedroom matters, because all men are naturally born gurus in all bedroom matters (or so they think?).

Women make an effort to learn a trick or two on how to make their men happy by reading relationships magazines. Unfortunately, men make no effort to learn a thing or two on the same. All they do is to assume that annoying know-it-all attitude in the bedroom.

In fact, for as long as I know, I have never heard of any group of men attempting to include a sex expert or sexologist in their various forums to prepare them on bedroom matters, and on how to best satisfy their women.

If anything, it’s them who really need some of these skills, if at all the number of women who call FM radios to complain about how lousy their men are between the sheets is anything to go by.

I assure you if you sit down and have a nice heart to heart chat with most women on this topic, you will get a list as long as Thika Super Highway of how disappointing some men can be.

Most men cannot even give a proper kiss to save their lives, and believe things such as foreplay are only meant for movies. And men still get surprised when their women show lack of interest in the bedroom? Come on men, up your game.

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