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Marriage Advice

Just let men marry second or third wives

A man having fun with two ladies                                    Photo:Courtesy

Women are wonderful creatures and a man should have as many as he can handle; as long as he can be fully responsible for all of them.

Me thinks polygamous men are the happiest and tend to live longer, a one–woman man is a slave of his own choice. If anything, when it comes to choosing leaders with the focus being on family, I will elect a polygamous man any day, because a man who can manage more than one woman is definitely worth his nuts.

When you have only one wife, the monopoly overwhelms her and that, my friend, is detrimental. When she knows she has no competition, she will be careless in the kitchen and serve her man what even a dog would think twice before eating!

She would sulk like a baby and think she is entitled. But when another woman is in the picture, that will stir her competitive side. It would be a continuous struggle to outdo each other, just so they could please the man.

I really pity the suffering monogamous men. God help the poor souls!  For instance, you come home late because you were genuinely at the local sipping a few cold bottles over a game of football.

 And when you get home, excited at the exploits of your team on the pitch and having won a bet as a bonus, you are met by the unexpected. After insistent knocks, the maid opens the door and warms your food. Wifey refuses to open the bedroom door and you have to crash on the couch.

She does not speak to you for two weeks and sleeps in jeans, soaks and a jacket! That other ‘kitchen’ will be closed for days! What a miserable life!

Now, it is even worse when she is the so-called modern, emancipated woman of today. She will come home from work, take a shower and sit with a laptop or remote and nonchalantly tell you, “Honey, let us order some food or just make something for yourself. I am tired!”

Of course she is a trophy wife. That is why you also need that shao woman who can boost your ego and does not bore you with boardroom jargon, and would run your bath while dutifully treating you like a king.

Polygamous men understand that it is natural to have more than one wife, even science has proved that! May be men might be challenged financially, but if truth be told, no one would back off from a second helping. A polygamous man is really a ndume kamili!

Furthermore, having two or more wives is far much better than sleeping around. What is worse, having one wife and sleeping round with anything in a skirt, or marrying a second wife and settling down to a life of shuttling between their bedrooms? Think about it.  It is even more expensive to keep a mpango wa kando who will demand holidays and other extravagances. Just get someone you can marry.

When she is the only lady, a woman’s headache excuses might become a tad bit too much. She can sexually bully you and deny you your conjugal rights just because you forgot the pet’s birthday.

But when you have another wife, you can always seek relief from the other woman instead of uprooting your transformer in protest, like some guy did, or getting some random woman who might infect you with sexually transmitted infection.

Twisted as it may sound, men need to embrace polygamy so that some of our sisters who do not mind sharing do not end up singe and lonely.

 I know women will be up in arms over my article, calling it misleading and shallow, but here is a dose of the bitter pill ladies, as much we consider ourselves ‘progressive,’ ‘cultured’ ‘educated’ and ‘exposed,’ we cannot hold a candle to our mothers. They were disciplined, submissive, cultured, hard-working and decent to a fault. And you know what else? They accepted co-wives and lived like a family.

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