|Laptop (Photo Courtesy)|
In this fast moving world, finding the balance between making a living and spending time with family is a real challenge for any new father. Experts on family relationships say there can be no substitute for such father-son bonding.
We are being flooded with endless, and should I add, unsolicited advice on how to be better fathers. We are made to believe that our world will crumble if we do not follow to the letter the ‘counsel’ found in the many books on parenting.
As an example, one such piece of advice says a father should leave a note in his son’s bed before leaving for work to say that he will be thinking of him all day. We should also tell him something about his personality for no reason or occasion. Seriously? And I dare ask: Where did our fathers get the advice on parenting? The answer is simple. From experience.
For some of us who spent our early years in shags, our fathers had no problem spending time with us. The routine was, and still is fixed. A small child is either in his mother’s back or laps, and if older, either in school or at home doing household chores. If our parents wanted to work in the shamba, all they had to do was look for a shady place in the garden, spread the leso and leave the baby to enjoy the cool breeze. Both kept an eye periodically, lest the toddler stuffs his mouth with soil.
Needless cries would be met with a stern look from the father. Lunch would also be served in the farm affording the father more opportunity to hold the child in his arms, albeit momentarily.
Times have changed, more so for city parents. Thanks to Western concepts, children require more pampering lest they turn into bullies.
Things are not made easier with promises of laptops in an era where parents are still in the analogue age. Watch this space.
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