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Five ways to improve your parenting skills

Parenting
 Instead of telling your kids what not to do, show them (Photo: Shutterstock)

If every child would come with a manual we would be popping them out every second. No matter how many books you buy and mothers you listen to, no one can ever prepare you for the journey of parenthood.

Considering you learn as you go, parenting happens to be one of the hardest and most frustrating jobs you will ever do.

Before you give up and throw in the towel, you need to remember that no one is perfect, not you nor your child. Being a good parent is about striving to do what is right for your child.

Raising good kids requires certain skills on the part of te parent to help you reach that goal. Here are a few ways you can improve your parenting muscles.

Be a good role model

Monkey see, monkey do pretty much summarize how children learn. If you don’t want them picking bad habits then you shouldn’t do anything in front of them that you wouldn’t want them to do.

Kids watch you and they imitate what you do because we are naturally programmed to copy actions and incorporate them into our own.

So instead of telling them what not to do, show them. If you find yourself reacting in some type of way during certain situations, it is time to make the necessary changes or they will mimic your bad behaviour.

 Show them love through actions (Photo: Shutterstock)

Love them

Do not allow anyone to make you feel guilty for loving your child too much because there is no such thing as showing too much love. Show them love through actions such as hugging, holding their hand and kissing their cheek. This makes them feel safe and loved.

Spending time with them also shows that they are a priority. Put your phone away and engage with them. Showing interest in their passions will help them know that you understand them. Do things they love with them to let them know you care and love them.

Listen

The only way to know what your child is going through and feeling is by listening to them. Look them in the eye and pay complete attention. Touching them gently and reaching out to them as they talk demonstrates that you empathize.

Ask questions and repeat what they’re saying so that they know you understand them at their level.

 Allow your child to be themselves instead of berating them when they fall short of your expectations (Photo: Shutterstock)

Control your emotions

How you react after a customer service agent annoys you or after an argument with your partner, can have a negative effect on your child. It might be difficult especially in the heat of the moment but try not to let out your anger and frustrations in front of your kids. The younger kids may become fearful and anxious if you lose your cool in their presence.

Yelling, shouting and cursing will only show your kids how to react in similar situations. Teach them to control their emotions by resolving problems in a calm manner.

Learn how to manage your stress and teach your kids the same. 

Flexibility

As parents, we sometimes have unrealistic expectations and goals for our kids. If you choose to be that perfect parent who only expects things to go a certain way, parenting will start feeling burdensome and overwhelming.

Soon you will start putting pressure and stress on your kids to meet standards that aren’t fair. Your kids may be afraid to talk about their fears and failures now that they expect too much from themselves too.

Each child is different so avoid putting them down when they fall short of your expectations. Instead, go with the flow and reevaluate your expectations allowing each child to come into their own.

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