Popular TV personality Willis Raburu has been through it all. Divorce, losing a child, heartbreak and dealing with societal pressure.
During an interview with a vernacular TV station, Willis opened up on his former relationships and how he coped with the storms that came his way.
“The reason a lot of people know about my relationships is because of social media. And looking back, if I had an option I wouldn’t have advertised my relationships on social media,” he stated.
He went on to explain his love journey and how he got the go-ahead and blessings from family but still, things failed to workout.
“Not only do you feel the heartache but it comes with embarrassment as well. Everyone is always gossiping about you…you’ll hear people whispering about. Divorce and child loss is something I wouldn’t wish even upon my worst enemy,” added Willis.
Opening up on his troubled marriage, Willis said divorce was the last resort after trying other avenues of resolving issues in his marriage.
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“It was very difficult because when you decide to settle on divorce, it means you have tried so many other things like talking, therapy, tried going to church…But when it reaches a point where all your misunderstandings are pointed towards hurting your partner then it’s better to just stay as friends,” explained Willis.
Learn to speak up
“Bottling a lot of issues in marriage is not healthy. Men are told they need to be strong and not cry but in reality, I was sad and crying on the inside. When I left the house I used to cry as well,” he said.
Adding: “You can only be strong for so long as it is assumed men should be. But it reaches a point when you have had enough and can’t take it anymore. And when you reach the end, you start to be resentful towards your partner as they are towards you.”
He admitted things happened so fast and as a media personality, his life was all over social media.
“Personally I was thinking about my life…people know me, I am a Christian I go to church, people know my dad, people see me on TV, my marriage was on social media, couple goals and all then now divorce!”
However, what Willis knew for sure was that he could not go on pretending, going to work smiling like everything was okay when on the inside he was hurting.
“At the end of it you have to count the costs, your sanity comes first and for the sake of peace both internally and externally divorce is the only option when you have reached the end.”
He urged married couples to look at themselves critically and admit fault in order to resolve conflict.
“You must also acknowledge that as much as your partner is on the wrong, what role did you play in this? But first you must forgive yourself.”
He went on to say, “It is heavy and painful and I haven’t exactly moved on…I think about all of them, from Sally, Marya to my late child. And it is still painful.”