Last week, columnist Oyunga Pala wrote a very interesting article about how difficult it is for partners of different body weights to cope together. And, of course, the emphasis was on the pressure women have to be in tip top condition as far as weight is concerned.

I did agree with most of it, however, one particular bit of the article irked me. That part where an assumption is made that men have no obligation to be fit or trim. And that the pressure only falls on a woman. Men can look how they want, especially if they have money. Really? Come on!

Then a colleague of mine echoed this same delusional assumption when he sobbed to me about how his wife had put on a lot of weight following the birth of their baby late last year. He claimed her weight has since become such a turn off, and he no longer feels interested in making love to her.

Well, I can tell you for free, it’s not like my colleague is Idris Elba, or his physique is anything closer. At the prime age of 31, he has a tummy that looks like he is pregnant! And then there is the fact that he can barely walk up the stairs without breathing heavily, you would think he just came off the track.

Death threat

My colleague is not alone, the world has changed, and men are no longer buff and muscular. Back in the day, a man with a burgeoning tummy was usually in his 60s and above. Unfortunately, these days very many young men sport pot bellies. Gentlemen, what is it?

Further, for every 12 joggers you see in Nairobi, only one or two are men. More interestingly, they are always foreigners.

Go to the gym and the statistics are just as shocking. This time you will find some men, but they are over 50 and have probably been given a ‘death threat’ by their doctor.

It is as if men today do not know that they, too, have a duty to look their best. In fact, men seem so caught up in their own egos and inflated sense of self-worth that they now blame women for their own chubby bodies. Trust men to find a scapegoat in women.

I do not know if it is a protective mechanism, but men actually believe that women are not visual, that we do not get excited when we see an Adonis specimen of a man.

Look here gentlemen, just so you know, women are also visual creatures. Oh yes, we women like our men buff, trim and fit. If you are not sure what buff, trim and fit looks like please Google, ‘Usher Raymond shirtless’ or ‘Boris Kodjoe shirtless’, and if you are still confused try Google, ‘Joe Manganiello shirtless’.

Why don’t men hear this often enough from the women in their lives? Because we women are polite, that is what mama taught us.

Well, fortunately, my mother never got through to me, so let me tell it as it is. The only woman on this earth who thinks a chubby man is cute is his mother! Of course, she must massage her son’s ego.

Further, the woman who claims that she likes a chubby man is just being polite because she feels societal pressure to cover up for her man’s shortcomings. And if your wife encourages you to put on weight, she is just ensuring that no one else will want you.

When you are fat, surely, how are you going to execute bedroom gymnastics? By the way, when was the last time you saw a fat gymnast? Gentlemen, I rest my case. But if you insist on putting on weight, all the best, but just don’t blame your wife when she fools around with your fit shamba boy or watchman.