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By | January 11th 2012 at 00:00:00 GMT +0300

"The King (Henry) is back, an Arsenal fan roared." This on a night 24-year-old Lionel Messi of Barcelona FC was collecting yet another gong — the World Player of the Year award for an unprecedented third year in a row raking in with 47.88 per cent of the vote by national team coaches, captains and selected media. Sadly, the Beautiful Game was on the same night being sullied by racial abuse of of Everton striker Louis Saha. He is just the latest victim of fans and players behaving badly, letting the world know who is the better player. Suppose all these non-Caucasian players just ignored the insults and score even more goals? What could the bullies do next?

Okay, so Al Shabaab is to blame for everything now? From eating up money to pay doctors and stock Malaraquin to punching holes in Uhuru Kenyatta’s coffers at the Treasury. But now, we are all forced to endure the Beep! Beep! of a device that has become every security guard’s extended arm. In fact, you can no longer just breeze into any building or matatu. Just ask Rebecca Kerubo Morara, who has acquired overnight ‘celeb’ status. Now she has to skulk behind shadows because people are reportedly calling her Governor. Let’s all reslve kick this Al Shabaab monster out of Kenya.

When the Republican campaign became a veritable slugfest, some adjectives to describe eventual Iowa loser Newt Gingrich (right) were hilarious. Senator Ron Coburn said: "I’m not inclined to be a supporter of Newt Gingrich having served under him for four years and experienced personally his leadership. I found it lacking often times." Then came Congresswoman Michelle Bachmann, saying the former Speaker is "as establishment as you get... he is a "memory-challenged professor." Is there is some hate speech in there somewhere, I wonder?

And finally...

And staying with the law and penalties,it is now a crime to leave a vehicle engine idling for more than three minutes, thanks to The Motor Vehicle Idling (Fixed Penalty) Ordinance. This mouthful came courtesy of the packed city’s Environmental Protection Department. The stipulated fine for engines"idling for more than three minutes in any 60-minute period" on ALL roads is 320 HK dollars (Sh3,500!

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