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Fake a headache at your own risk

By BY NIKKO TANUI | November 4th 2013


You can deny a man food for a whole week and he will somehow survive. But deny a man his conjugal rights and he will behave like rabid dog.

Men can beg for sex like they are on fire. When denied they have a proclivity to sulk like a child who has been denied a lollipop.

That’s how it’s, when a man want to burst a nut, he can literally do anything to satisfy the urge.

So important is carnal fulfillment that even the Bible is littered with verses imploring couples to cater for each other’s needs.

For instance, 1 Corinthians 7:3 explicitly says: The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband.

However, many women, more so the church going types, are given to ignore this advice. May be they skip that very page when reading the Bible altogether.

So serious is the issue that I recently read in the papers that some poor man went berserk and attacked his wife, seriously injuring her for being denied access to what he believed was rightfully his.

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Monkey business

Boys, things can get thick in the bedroom. Women nowadays even want to have their own bedrooms and beds just to escape the claws of their husbands.

They are not into sex anymore to a point some mothers are audacious enough to bring an overgrown baby to the bedroom, risking its life by placing it between them and their husband.

This is done to discourage him from attempting any monkey business in the middle of the night.


Ironically, the women who don’t love the good old joystick are the ones busy buying sex toys.

I once stumbled upon a didlo in some woman’s house and before I could make out that it was just some plastic, it gave me the fright of my life.

I thought she had chopped it off from a man and I was the next victim. Boy, was I scared? But that is a story for another day.

Back to the day’s subject, I have never understood why a woman would think of denying a man his conjugal rights. Unless she is sick or just had a baby of which any right thinking man will understand.

It is morally unacceptable for a grown up, healthy woman to deny her man fleshly pleasure. It is simple, if you are not up to the game, men don’t mind if you don’t participate as long as they satisfy their end.

You can lie there, plaiting your hair and he might be thankful. That way, you can deter him from quenching his thirst elsewhere.

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