What is it with men and being allergic to lotion?
Two things happened on August 9. The Kenyan electorate voted for their new leaders, and Kenyan men showed us they are brave enough to walk around looking like people who have just stepped out of a posho mill.
They posted their hands on social media and when we saw their fingernails, we finally understood why UTIs are such a common occurrence among Kenyan women. If they washed their hands more regularly, they would kill the UTI medication industry but they prefer to do the unpaid dirty work of bringing them clients. After all, masculinity dictates that men’s hands have to be a little dirty or they are not manly enough.
Apart from the fingers being a health hazard to the women they sleep with, their hands were also extremely ashy, and dry.
You could tell that moisturising is a myth.
Self-care is such a big issue with heterosexual men because of the socialisation they got while growing up.They believe that self-care is inherently feminine or gay.
It should not be a topic of discussion but it is because they adhere to restrictive societal norms related to manhood that do not allow them to be.
Moreover, gender norms have long dictated and reaffirmed that heterosexual relationships are based on how much the woman can clean up after the men in her life and it is a cycle that has been accepted as the way of life.
Mothers clean up after their sons, who later marry women who clean up after them. Sisters clean up after their brothers and they later graduate into wives and girlfriends, who clean up after their intimate partners.
At some point, men have to accept that they are just dirty, not masculine. There is nothing masculine about walking around comfortably with dirty, ashy hands, and crusty skin that looks more reptilian than human because you were last oiled by your mother. Putting on some lotion has never killed anyone.
They also have to admit that they just lack the necessary life skills. Not being able to clean up after yourself is not a masculine trait.
It is just basic hogwash that contributes to the vast population of men and children, who cannot exist on their own without having women by their side.
Men marry because cooking is stressful. They marry because they hate doing laundry and the dishes. This stuff is so normalised that when people see a man with a dirty house, they recommend getting a wife without realising that these norms have a direct implication for men’s health and their life expectancy.
Research suggests that men who stay single have a 32 per cent chance of dying up to 17 years earlier than men who find life partners. The quality of our lives depends on the care we receive from ourselves or others.
They get sick and you have to force them to go to the hospital. They actually only go to the hospital when they are on the verge of dying. Most of the time, they just survive on vibes and Inshallah.
The lack of care is one of the many reasons why widowers and divorced men are hit with the loss harder than their female counterparts.
Research suggests that partnered men experience improved mental health and a lower risk of depression and I wouldn’t dispute it. Eating bread and Fanta for supper is definitely not a healthy way of living.
Society needs to define masculinity and what it means to be a manly man. Being comfortable with ashy, rough hands and dirty nails is not cute.
Cut your nails and stop giving women UTIs.