By Smitta Smitten
âMakmende Makmende Makmendeâ â¦ that was the virtual vybe of Kenyans all of last week, in cyberspace, bars n cafes â as Pulsers n Pulsaters strove to out-makmende each other on jokes n updates.
âMakmendeâ may be new, but he just the laytest âKenyanâ phenomenon (although he might be our first fad to have made it into the prejistous âUkuta Streetâ journa).
Everyone had sumzing to say about Makmende â our very own homegrown Jack Bauer/Superman, wit the chuo boyâs tie n an afro, whoâs like the âFirst Bodyâ in the world â n straight out of the 80s.
I still recall the First Body in our Praima, a guy from Kiserian calld Geoffree Zimbo who, unfortunately, waz as thick as he was thickset. In Class Six after histo, I nicknamed the dude âZimbo, the Zinjaâ n he wekead me âwanted,â before we broke for Easter hols, n gave me the hidinâ of a lifetime. Zinja, if ya readinâ this, all I can say is "nye nye nye nye nyeeee, yu canât catch me."
This dude evn got advice on how to extend his popularity from intellectually half-cooked entertainment ryters who semad he should "get a love interest" (yet the âunclichâeâ way he bounces from the dudette at the end â a the Ha-He video totally adds to his cool-o-meterix!).
Me advice to all such know-it-all about the âmuzikâ industry entertainment ryters is first work on ya English (sayin âmore biggerâ in ya copy is so-ooo Standard Two) b4 yu dare give adviski to Makmende. Msceeeeww!!
Tha only thang I can say is âMakmendeâ phenomena will last until World Cup, then the amnesia of the omena minds of many miros will move on to other fish ta fry â like World Cup.
In tha meantime, there will be âmogekoyosâ in River Road â I printinâ T-shos with âMakmendeâ on the front, n quotes like âDeath had a near Makmende experienceâ at the back, as Just-A-Band bask in the glow of âfifteen minutes oâ Kenyan style fame,â n pirates mint chinky on theyâa name. Thaz juzz the way this thug town u-perates.
I feel a lil ill for âJua Caliâ releasinâ his creative Miaka video-shizzle same week as âMakmendeâ hit. N yu can bet ya belt (n the boxers underneath) dat the mara hiyo hiyo thing that waz just beginning to catch fire has been 4ever squashed under the Makmende craze.
So, watt other Kenyan crazes a-been a-foot oâer da years, dat seized the Kinyan mind, at least 4 a bit, n mostly created by the zizki industry in the country?