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The reason why Women will never make the first move

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 Women from ages have silently been victims of love dictated by societal norms. They suffer silently when they develop feelings towards men of their desire but will never utter it even if it means going to the grave with it. By any chance she dares speak out her mind, her character will be questionable.

I was perturbed in my encounter with them as they narrated their ordeals characterized by emotional torments and psychological traumas. The norm is widely and equally distributed throughout the population, both the literate and illiterate. Even a degree and a masters holding woman will never unravel her feelings unless the man makes a first move.

According to Anne a student at a local University the societal norm has been a stumbling block to many women. "wWe do suffer silently but as the society requires a man is the one to propose but not a woman" said Anne. She further argues that women have often recieved back lash whenever they resorted to blow the whistle first. "There is a perception that if a woman makes a move first then she is cheap or desperate" notes Anne. According to Anne the societal norms should be a thing of the past and give women equal space in the society.

Furthermore women who are most affected are the ones who eye their male counterparts silently but have no gut to stand before them men and open their hearts. Take for instance the case of Enock, a banker in Kisii town, who was confronted by her colleague for changing his profile picture on Whatsapp to that of his fiancee.

"My collegue became furious and dramatic after i changed my Whatsapp profile picture. After probing her, she opened up and revealed how she had been eying me" notes Enock.

According to Enock if women were given chance and the perception changes then their silence will be at long last be heard and felt. He further argues that identifying these type of women is a simple task.

"If you send her a text then her response is negative or no response at all, she is hurt in a way" narrates Enock.

However men criticize women's behavior as unrealistic. Women will display mixed behavior and this leaves most men in dilemma. It is high time women go against societal norms and open up. We are living in an ever changing and dynamic world that is occasioned by change. According psychologist Peter Omae, a lecturer at Maseno University, societal norms are the main reason as to why women have been unable to express their feelings. “Women are born and raised in a society that demeans them, forcing them to wait until the man proposes” notes Omae.

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