By Mboch

Dear Diary,

I almost thought I wouldn’t make it to my interview. Now in 45 minutes I will know what my future will be.

If this does not work, I might have to give Junior back to his grandmother.

I know mum really resented me for bringing her a baby.

I shamed her and wasted all the chances that God had given me.

I could not show my face back at the school, so I just dropped out in form three.

At least after Junior was born, mum stopped beating me. She even slaughtered for me a chicken! But the special treatment didn’t last. Before long she showed me the door.

My sister went and got ‘married’ so she could also have children. She was always so competitive and immature.

Now the way her and her stupid husband live, always fighting and throwing insults at each other in the kijiji.

The Mama of the bureau told me to fill in my details and attach a photocopy of my ID to this form, together with references.

I do not have any references. The Mama of the salon would not give me any.

She refused to pay me after I caught her with a male client.

I pretended not to have seen anything but it was just embarrassing for all of us.

I don’t know why anyone would want to have anything to do with men.

They are just bad news. After my experience with Baba Junior, I despise men.

I just hope I get a job working for a family of a single mother, or a widow.

One of the ayahs was saying that she has not come to look for a job; that she is looking for a man.

I know we steal people’s husbands, but the way there are diseases these days!

At the interview, she asked me tough questions; about my health, boyfriends, and First Aid! Heh!

Then the hardest one was whether I have someone I can leave Junior with, if I got called for a job.

I looked down and told her quietly that Junior and I have to stick together.

I hoped she would not see the tears in my eyes, because the last thing I wanted to do was to start explaining to her what we have gone through. Now let me pack. Jesus, I hope she calls tomorrow.