I am 36 years old and married to a 60-year-old man. We got married after his first wife died of cancer. Two years ago when I was pregnant with my first baby with him, we went for a HIV test and unfortunately he turned out positive while I was negative. I accepted him the way he was. But now there is a problem. I want a second baby and I donÂft want it by him because I fear that he will infect the baby and I with the virus. I am thinking of getting pregnant by another man whom I am sure is HIV negative. The man is not aware of my plan, neither is my hubby. I donÂft know what to do because I have never had an affair but I desperately need another baby. Please adviceÂc {Mary}
Your take:
Mary, please do not betray your husband. What if you were the one who was HIV positive. Children are a gift from God. It is not up to us to decide when to have them but God does. Think soberly about this before you make a costly blunder.
{Oyoo Wycklife}
The desire to have a child does not justify the evil you want to commit. You have other safe and morally justified options. These include pre-exposure prophylaxis, where the uninfected partner takes ARVs to avoid infection.
There is also artificial insemination, which is safe but expensive. These techniques help discordant couples to conceive without passing the virus to the unborn child. Adoption is another great option for you.
{Kighambo Danson}
Mary, visit a good government medical facility and talk to a fertility expert about available options.
Second, you need to know about the window period. Talk to him and see what he thinks about the whole matter. By cheating on him you could also expose yourself to HIV and other STDs.
{Tasma Charles}
Do not think that you can fool your husband with your heinous plan. Rest assured if you go ahead with it, he will detect that the pregnancy is not his because you always use protection when having sex with him. The way forward is to talk to him and tell him your heartÂfs desire.
