Mother of eight raising children with her husband and the gay lover he left her for

England: Most women would see red, some might even turn violent, but when this mother-of-eight's husband left her for another man she invited them all to live together.

Jardine Smith was heartbroken after discovering Paul Hartley, her husband of 10 years, had been having an affair.

But incredibly, after just a year apart she asked them both to move in with her and even gave Paul's partner the privilege of being a dad to her children.

And the trio say that although unconventional, their family works and they do "everything together".

Jardine said: “We’ve lived together and we do everything together .If there’s problems at school with the children we will all consult about it. We’re like a family unit.

“People can’t understand but I would rather have Paul in my life. He’s my best friend and my soul mate and he’s always been there for me. Leo is a nice person as well and we all work together as a team.

“If I ever meet anyone again they will have to accept my gay husbands because I would never push them away from me or my kids.”

Despite their unusual arrangement Jardine says the family have never had any backlash.

She added: “Luckily we’ve not had much of a problem. If one of the kids comes home and says they’ve been picked on because someone said their dad was gay I always tell them they’re lucky to have three parents that love them.

“At the end of the day you can’t help who you fall in love with and they know that.

“They have a mum and two dads. That’s the way I see our lives.”

The family came to arrangement a year after Jardine had confronted Paul about illicit texts she had found on his phone from Leo, and he moved to Devon to be with his lover.

Jardine, 40, was left alone to care for the couple’s four children Megan, 15, Bradlee, 13, Mollie, 12 ,and Lilly, eight, as well as two from a previous relationship Jamie, 21, and Charlotte, 20.

But Paul missed the kids and moved back to Harlow, in Essex - with Leo in tow - after Jardine met his new lover.

She said: “When I met Leo I didn’t feel jealous at all. Obviously I was devastated when Paul left but I was able to accept it more because he left me for a man not a woman.”

In the period of Paul's absence Jardine fell pregnant by a new boyfriend, but when that relationship broke down she took the extraordinary step of asking Leo if he wanted to be the baby's dad.

She said: “Leo didn’t have any kids of his own and wasn’t able to have them. I said he could take on this child as the dad wasn’t around.

“People say I’m amazing but I was pleased to give Leo the gift of being a parent.”

Leo now acts as a dad to Jardine’s two youngest children Haydon, three, and Erin, five, after a relationship to another boyfriend broke down.

Jardine said: “The six older ones call Paul ‘Daddy’ and the two younger ones call Leo ‘Daddy’.

“But really all my kids have two dads and a mum and I always tell them how lucky they are.”

Jardine, who claims disability benefit, said that she first discovered Paul was having an affair when she found a message on his phone which read: "I can’t wait to be with you, I love you."

She explained that Paul has taken three of the kids on holiday to Devon, and had met Leo while there.

“They’d been messaging for months. It felt like such a betrayal.

“I was heartbroken. After 10 years together I felt absolutely devastated that I was going to lose my best friend," said Jardine.

But despite being gutted by Paul’s explosive revelation Jardine admits that the signs were there from the beginning.

She said: “When we first got together Paul told me he was bisexual. But I’d never seen him with a man so to me it wasn’t real for me.”

Paul, 34, said: “When I was a teenager I fancied boys and girls but then I met Jardine and we went from being really good friends to boyfriend and girlfriend.

“Looking back there was a certain amount of pressure on me to be straight when we first got together. I was confused.

“But then we got on really well and we ended up being together for a long time.

“I didn’t expect to meet Leo and end up having feelings for him but I did. Emotions took over and I thought ‘I can’t live this lie anymore’.”

Paul, a carer, decided to move down to Devon to make his relationship with Leo work and the pair married in September 2008.

But he found that he missed his children terribly and would call up regularly.

Jardine said: “By that time I was pregnant again and facing raising seven kids by myself.

“I didn’t care if Leo was part of the picture. I just wanted Paul back in my life.”

Leo and Paul moved back in in 2009 and Jardine made up a bed for them on the couch.

She said: “When I first met Leo it was strange. He’d taken my husband away but I couldn’t compare myself to him because he was a man.

“If it was a woman it would have been different.

“If a man leaves you for a woman it’s for a reason. She might be younger, prettier or nicer. But Paul left me for a man. He was gay and he had his needs.

“He said to me ‘you are everything I want in a woman. But I want a man’.

“It made me feel better.

“When they moved in it was obviously a bit awkward at first but I saw how good Leo was with the kids and it soon became normal for us to live in the same house.

“The kids just seemed to accept the new living situation. Some of them were too young to understand anyway. I think the older ones were a bit wary of a new man in the house but Leo was great with them and they loved having their dad back.”

Leo, a security guard, admits that there was a tension between him and Jardine but that the pair slowly bonded over the next couple of months.

He said: “There was a lot of animosity between me and Jardine to begin with, and I think she thought I was stepping on her toes. It was also difficult because me and Paul were cementing our relationship which must have been hard for her.

“But after a while she realised that I was going to be there for Paul and that her and the kids were part of the package. After that we became friends.”

After welcoming Leo into the family Jardine took the remarkable step of asking him to raise her unborn child with her.

She said: “I grew up without at dad and I didn’t want my baby growing up without a dad.

“Because Leo didn’t have his own children and because Erin had nothing to do with her father I said to him ‘would you like to take her on as your own’?

“He was so touched that he cried.”

When Jardine went into labour in July 2009 she went to the hospital with both Leo and Paul.

She said: “While Paul was wonderful it was Leo who stayed by my side for the four days I was in there.

“He was proud as punch of his little daughter and I could tell he was chuffed when the nurses called him ‘dad’.

“Together the three of us decided on a baby name and it felt natural to come up with decisions together.”

Leo said: “Obviously it would have been difficult for me to have my own kids and Jardine has allowed me to do that.

“I’m really grateful to her because I love being a dad.”

Paul and Leo eventually moved out of Jardine’s house in 2010 but they moved just a few streets away and the family continues to see each other every day.